Monday, November 19, 2012

Ho Ho Ho

 I LOVE Christmas. When I was a kid it was the best ever. My mom would throw a block party on Christmas Eve, the neighbors would come over, drink lots, eat lots; everything seemed so simple then. We would listen to the radio station that claimed to be spotting Santa and my dad would stand on the porch every year with his gun to pretend to shoot him out of the sky. Come to think of it...my dad had a gun???
Knowing my mother she would definitely have everyone out at the latest midnight, get all tidied up in preparation for the morning. She would never get drunk, so she could be the best mom ever in the morning. We put out cookies and milk on our fire place and open our one Christmas Eve present from our Oma in Holland. It always came in a big box wrapped in butcher style paper. It would be filled with stroopwafels, handmade sweaters, chocolate initals in J, T, K, W. (My mom always ended up eating all the letters the following week). Then we were sent upstairs for bed. My mom and dad would spend the next few hours doing last minute wrapping and bringing all the presents downstairs to literally FILL the whole living room. It was unbelievable. We would wake up in the morning and my dad- EVERY-SINGLE year would say he has to go down and check if Santa came, as he didn't think he did this year, or the year before, or the year before that. Yet, he always came, nonetheless, we were not spoiled kids, but on Christmas we were, and bloody hell we deserved it. We were such good children my mom still says to this day. We would always take a break half way through opening, and NEVER would we open two at a time. We all took turns, Ty and I always had the same amount of gifts. My mom would make herself another cup of tea, my dad coffee, at break. After we were done opening we would try on all our clothes, listen to our new cd's, skim through our new books, my mom would start making eggs benny, and my dad would help put together anything technical that we received. Every year he got my mom a new perfume even though she HATES perfume. I remember always wanting her to like it, but knew she never did. She would by him a new pair of Levi's and white runner's. every.single.year.
I would get my dad a soap on the rope for his birthday, Father's day, and Christmas. I don't think he ever used them.
These memories are so amazing I'm almost in tears writing this. Even after my parents split it was the exact same, just no dad to shoot Santa and tell us that he maybe hadn't arrived...

Last year Luca and I were in Costa Rica for the Holidays. We left December 14th on purpose.  It was my first year as a solo mama, and I was on a mission to be in a different country than r.a.w. I wanted to pretend Christmas wasn't really Christmas. The thought of him asking for her made my stomach turn and the thought of him not asking for her made me rage. The thought of him spending it with his mistress made me want to throw myself out of a glass window. The only way, in my eyes,  to avoid all that was to leave the country for the winter.

Unfortunately, we cannot go to Central America every winter... I know...total bummer!
I am forecasting the special day to be a little bit weepy for me, but it's only a day and next year I'm sure to be spending it as a three-some. Luca is so excited for Santa and all that Mastercard is bringing her, i'm excited for rum and eggnog, baking parties, and a Christmas tree. This time of the year is truly special.








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